Deadlock.

Everything has come to a deadlock, which only increases the amount of failure in my life.
I cannot afford a deadlock, not now, not ever. It seems as though I am blocking myself from crucial information which is required to break said deadlock.
Yes life goes on and so does time, but the deadlock has a much deeper importance than just being a deadlock.
It represents so much that has been going on and it is preventing several good things from happening. I try to go forward, I try to solve it all, but nothing seems to work. Have I lost my touch to read myself and see what is troubling me?
I can't answer that question because it's all in a deadlock, hence I can ask the questions but the solutions are not available to me at this point.
As several happenings has changed my priorities in the past days I have also been able to spot what's up ahead and even though it is clear what is coming the deadlock prevents me from facing these events.
This will render in most unpleasant consequences that will really change the frest of my life.
So I ask myself, is it really a coincidence that the deadlock occurs at such crucial times as it is?
Probably not, but now I must work around my deadlock in order to figure out it's purpose so I can solve it and be rid of it. Only then can I once again challenge myself on a mental level.
Only then can I be 100% sure what is to come.
Deadlock + Future = FAILURE!