Once again i've been thinking, and not in the good way, about myself. It is above me how my personality time after time has the ability to drive people off. It is also above me how I many times don't care if I do, but I must admit some people was never ment to be driven away. What is done is however done and those I have already driven away will without a doubt be more than hard to "win back". I am who I am, or at least that's what I keep telling my self only to make the situation a little more bearable. If I didn't believe that I am who I am as far as my personality goes, I would probably destroy myself mentally more than I have already done. This inevitably raises the question "How can you tell yourself something knowing it is a trick on your own mind?". I wonder that myself, and have so far not come up with a single answer that seems logical, I guess i'm just an idiot.
Now comes the interesting part, which ties this entry together with a former one. How can I change my personality to the better when those who dislike it just disappear, or ignore me. I can't change without some feedback on both good and bad stuff. So it's a bitch really, being stuck with a personality most cannot stand. It hasn't driven me mad yet, but i'll bet that moment is not too far away from the present. All these thoughts being brought to life mearly by looking at my msn and facebook contacts, friends does not always get you in a good mood, sometimes they unconsciously hurt you as well...
1 comment:
Its hard being yourself when you are not comfortable with yourself you dont sound very confident sum bits that you sed was quite funny but dont put yourself down your making yourself negative try and think of all the good things you have done and things that have made people laugh maybe you have just changed in to another character and you cant find yourself no more try and be that person you was before your friends stopped bothering you be happy smile laugh make over people laugh make yourself feel better stop telling yourself that you are an idiot you sre not you need some confidence do something random that is funny and stop teeling your brain that your an idiot you are not an IDIOT
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