The title might exaggerate what has actually happened. I've had many seperate thoughts lately and although they would be somewhat interesting I didn't feel they were large or important enough to get it's own blog entry. Then all of a sudden I get this twitch right before I go to sleep. I'm referring to last night, when really dark thoughts hit my mind. I got cold inside, thoughts long forgotten re-surfaced in an instant. Could it be that many of my dark thoughts and memories are not stored inside my head, but stored in a specific location.
It all felt like som sort of deja vu, me lying in bed not really having any cares at all, and then BANG. Is it healthy having a brain that functions like this?
The thoughts themselves are not something I'm going to post here because it's something that I'v e written about before. Let's just say that they were the kind of thoughts that seemed so real you actually thought they were happening. I still believe they are going to happen right now. Selfish and unselfish thoughts at the same time, pathetic and true, serene and chaotic. Thoughts that are everything and nothing. Normally my own disturbed mind would ignore the thoughts quite quickly, but then again there are moments in life which seem so absurd that you can't even call it a coincidence.
I saw a movie today, a movie that just might reflect what type of person I will become some day in the future. I did not like what I saw. Then again it's not completely false, because I have been known to hate large crowds, and I have been known to have days where I just recent people. This movie sort of validated many of my dark thoughts I had yesterday. I would go into detail but that would disturb the sleep I am about to have. So I'll leave you with two little questions. Does our life predict our future for us sometimes? Do we really have any power at all?
Where is the girl from the dream with the hug... she might be the one to save me...
No comments:
Post a Comment